I Will Love Myself Chapter 07
The 42-year-old Noelle taught me many things.
“Your feelings matter the most,” she said.
“Please no one. Don’t do anything against your will.
If you don’t like something, voice your opinion. If you can’t do something, say it.”
Looking at her, I was confused.
This wasn’t what Mom and Dad taught me.
At home, they kept telling me, “Elle, don’t compete with Rach.
“She likes this. Let her have it.
“Studying is energy-consuming. You must understand.”
Over time, I learned to observe others’ expressions and consider what they wanted. I comforted myself with a smile, “It’s OK. Rach is older. She should have it first.”
But the 42-year-old me told me otherwise. She made me realize that was wrong.
I felt comfortable being with her.
I could eat my favorite food without having to consider whether Rachel liked it.
I could wear the clothes I liked. No more hand-me-downs from Rachel.
When I got to the classroom in a new uniform, the instructor smiled at me with a nod, “You look great today.
“As much as you started learning several years later than other kids, you have excellent innate coordination.”
She patted me on the shoulder and went on, “Don’t waste your talent.”
I felt utmost confidence at once.
As if incapable of feeling fatigue, I spent all my spare time practicing in the classroom after class.
When the 42-year-old Noelle… No, she was 45 now.
When the 45-year-old Noelle came to pick me up, she smiled to see me sweat all over.
“Your dream has finally come true. I’m happy for you.”
“Your dream has finally come true. I’m happy for you.”
With her arm around my shoulders, we walked toward the parking lot.
Under the setting sun, our figures cast overlapping long shadows. It was hard to tell which was the 21-year-old and which was the 45-year-old.
“Do your best.”
With that, she got into the car.
Suddenly, two familiar figures appeared outside the car.
It was my parents.