No One Came Chapter 19
After Nico was born, that feeling faded, a little more each year.
It faded so much that by the end, I wasn’t even sure it had ever been real.
But now I knew.
She had loved me once.
It was just that somewhere along the way, she gave all her attention to other things.
To her job, to the house, to Nico.
By the time she remembered how to love me, it was too late.
The wind picked up outside, rustling the curtains.
I could feel myself fading, like a thin mist slowly dispersing into the air.
I knew it was time for me to go.
Not to another place.
Just… away.
I didn’t know if there was a heaven, or if I would get a next time, or if there was another beginning waiting for me.
But I hoped so.
If there really was, I wanted to go somewhere I didn’t have to be afraid of dinner.
A place where I didn’t have to constantly read people’s faces, where I didn’t have to try so desperately to be good just to earn a scrap of attention.
I looked at Mom one last time.
She was still sending me messages, one after another, speaking into the void.
“Adriana, Mom bought you a new coat. Come back and try it on, okay?”
“Adriana, Mom won’t protect your brother anymore. Please come back, okay?”
“Adriana, Mom misses you.”
Her voice grew more and more distant.
My consciousness grew fainter.
I was like a leaf caught in the wind, drifting higher and higher, through the window, over the roof, and into the night sky.
There were so many stars overhead.
Tomorrow would probably be a clear day.
I closed my eyes.
If there is a next time, I don’t want to be anyone’s daughter.
And I don’t want to be anyone’s joke.
I just want to be treated like a real person.
Even if it’s only once.